Presenting Jyoti

When the human race left earth behind, no one expected us to last very long. The men dumped the women and children on a hastily constructed space station, the Gilman, like it was the 19th century instead of the 21st century. Then they went off to seek their fortunes, or whatever it is men do. We never heard from them again. As soon as they were gone, the women started to figure things out. We worked with what we had. We made peace with our new environment. And after 20 years, the High Committee decided that it was time to meet our neighbors.

We knew they were out there, of course. The galaxy is a lot smaller than you’d think, staring up at it from earth. There were hundreds of them, but they left us alone and we were focused on survival. We were understandably cautious, since we weren’t sure if they’d killed our men. And we didn’t want to repeat any of the mistakes made on earth, like starting a war. So we waited until we were ready. We did our research. And we made a plan.

The details aren’t important, except for my part. I’m Jyoti, Official Fashion Designer to the Diplomatic Committee. My sisters Julika and Jeneth and I were assigned by the High Committee to learn everything we can about how these aliens dress and put together outfits so our diplomats can show each species the respect they deserve. I was the natural choice for the job because I’ve been playing with the sewing machine my mother rescued from earth since I was knee-high to a trash bot. Julika knows how to make paint out of just about anything. And Jeneth is the brains of the operation. We were all babies when we arrived on the Gilman, and this is our first task assignment. We don’t want to screw it up.


I’m Jenny Cliff, and you’ve just heard the origin story of Diplomatic Duds, a new comedy web series brought to you by the Cliff-Hanger Productions team. Our intrepid heroines may be able to get by on nothing but their wits, but for us to hear their stories, we need your help. The first season of Diplomatic Duds features 10 exciting episodes. That’s 10 different alien species and 10 different fashion challenges for Jyoti, Julika and Jeneth to solve–a full 60 minutes of fashion on the final frontier! We’ve brought a lot of talented people together to bring you a fresh take on alien encounters, and all that’s missing is your support. And, don’t worry, you’ll get more for your money than just high-quality entertainment. To show our gratitude for your donation, you’ll also receive one of these fabulous rewards. Haven’t you always wanted to know what you’d look like as an alien? Thanks for listening, and don’t forget to follow us on social media to stay in the loop!

Presenting Jyoti

3 thoughts on “Presenting Jyoti

  1. Pink Angel says:

    Great presentation. I have a very clear vision of how your project will look . However, I do miss the budget outline and how you will bring the project to life. I believe a potential investor will want to see that.


  2. “I want to read about a world where patriarchy never existed and society has been built through collaboration for millennia.”

    I use the first practical module to differentiate between brainstorming to produce many ideas and pitching one specific, developed idea. I appreciated the variety of your pitches on Twitter and I loved the Cliff Test elevator speech for its simplicity. No Kickstarter, no budget necessary, you just wanted to suggest a better algorithm and you did. I love when someone’s assignment can change the concept for the class. A pitch can be a pad tossed in the kitchen. “Look at this.”

    I’m glad you picked the series to expand on. We can look at both your summary and speech through the assignments of the first half of the semester. First, did you tweet?

    “When the human race left earth behind, no one expected us to last very long. The men dumped the women and children on a hastily constructed space station, the Gilman, like it was the 19th century instead of the 21st century. Then they went off to seek their fortunes, or whatever it is men do. We never heard from them again.”

    That’s a great lede. I could ask, was it just the female children? But I won’t. It’s a far better lede than “According to Joss Whedon…” or “With apologies to John Scalzi…” A script proposal is a treatment and this one grabs me with a high concept, some indie quirk, and a practical execution. There’s the all female sci-fi universe, the unexpected but fun aliens and fashion mashup, and a single location. You’ll invest in the fashion designer. That’s good thinking.

    Your short intro and even faster ask belies the thought that went into this—like a summary should. You cover all three major algorithms: idea, how you will execute the idea, and how you will afford to execute the idea. I stress practicality with these assignments: small steps and drafts can become big ideas later. A handful of ten-minute online episodes and one set is feasible. Well done.

    As far as avatars, you mention “talented people.” Names and their credibility would help. If the images in your slideshow were from the production and the designer that would really help.

    You don’t have data, potential markets, preliminary budget numbers, how much you need from the audience. Kickstarters are often a panacea in this assignment similar to “a Facebook page will just bring me followers.” Crowdfunding is much more reliable for thorough production projects with finished scripts and recognizable talent. You wont have to ask for much though, and your small platform could develop into a sizable fan base.

    You read your speech. Memorization would give you the freedom to be more expressive and improvise. Playing one of the character voices for the treatment was a good effort. It’s more important to get the information clearly across to the audience though.

    Lastly, unlike a lot of students, your slides built on your presentation with artwork instead of just repeating your words.

    I use these assignments to move your writing into the practical. To go from a pitch to a presentation in three weeks is asking a lot. Again, well done, Jenny.


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